My Thoughts Always: Get A Grip

This is my blog.  I write how I think or feel on this blog.  This is the only blog in which I do so.  My other blogs are for specific subjects, not my personal life.  I do not write about events in my life that are personal on my other blogs.  This is a personal blog and it will remain that way.

If you land on this particular blog, you probably really irritate me.  Just saying that's how it goes on this blog.  Since I do keep the names of those who irritate me out of it, it doesn't implicate anyone.  Seems to me people want to do what they do and expect people not to get upset at them.

Fact: If you are involving yourself with my family in any way, especially my children and husband and I don't approve, chances are I will write about you.  If I am upset, I am going to write.  If I am crying because I think there may be a chance my husband could leave and you are the cause of it, I will write.

I have never been in love with another woman's husband and since I have only been with my husband, I'm not going to start now.  I do believe wholeheartedly you can control your emotions. 

There's a very good article on Helium that should be read:

"Being involved with a married man creates many difficulties for everyone. Falling in love with a married man is not good for you or for his family. You should consider yourself a better person than that. Sometimes, it is better to give something up that we love in order to live a more peaceful life."

and yet another on askDeb.com:

"This is the toughest dilemma in falling in love with a married man. Should you pursue the affair? You need to be honest with yourself. An affair with a married man is adultery. Are you the type of person that can live with that kind of blame? Can you be a homewrecker? If the answer is no, then you should not pursue the relationship, even if the man is interested in you. If he has an unstable marriage, then wait and see if he separates or divorces her. Should that occur, then he is fair game."

I don't know, if you read the Bible that would put it under sin of the 10 commandment variety.  No, in my case he is not and will not be fair game.

Why would you want to settle for second best?  Since he will not be having any more children (he is fixed), I will have to always be in his life.  Be honest, do you want me in your life? 

Here is yet another article:

"If you are dating a married man, it is more likely that your friends have advised you to put your affair with a married man to an end. The reason is justifiable. A woman loving a married man is more likely to suffer from emotional stress. For one, it is difficult to have an affair with somebody who has had marital vows with another. Two, women having an affair with married men are also more likely to just being used. Statistics have even showed that there are very few men who leave their family for another woman."

Used.  Not a pretty word.  Something I would never give any man the power to do.  No man will ever use me because I will not allow it.  If  I were to involve myself with a man who wears a ring, I know there would be no hope for me.  He married another woman, probably  even has kids.  Why would anyone take a father who is probably a good daddy away?  I can understand "female competition."  When children are involved it's on a whole new level.  In my shoes, I am fighting for my children.

I found this as a comment on yet another site:

I would get out of love with him as fast as you can. If he is cheating on this wife he will cheat on you. In most instances the relationship will not last anyway statistically. The forbidden fruit is an allure to many but restraint and discipline is what you need. You will have many lonely nights, empty weekends and holidays and just moments of sneaking. How would you feel in the wife's shoes if your situation were reversed?

Now that is an interesting question.  How would you feel in my shoes?

This is the thing, my husband tells me everything.  I know every detail that you probably don't want me to know.  I have been polite whereas I really want to use every curse word I know in reference to you.  I am entitled to my feelings since I am married to my husband and you are entitled to yours.  Where my husband is concerned you are not to act on those feelings.

This is all I will say on the matter.  You are not worth my time from my husband or children.  I am done with you, I wash my hands of you.   I hope this prompts you to search with in yourself because a true relationship with love requires work.  Exactly why I've been working on myself far more than thinking of you.